25 Random Things About Me

Wow, this stupid meme is going around quicker than a joint at a Phish concert. Since I am a mindless drone with no free will that would do whatever I’m told to do by a collection of people on an internet social networking site, many of which I hardly know to begin with, I will now succumb to the unrelenting peer pressure and present my own list.

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Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)

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1. Due to the way I was curled up in the womb with my fists tucked into my eye sockets, I was born with two black eyes.

2. I once stood at a urinal taking a piss next to Jeffrey Gaines, my all-time favorite singer/songwriter, about 15 minutes before he was scheduled to go on stage for a concert.

3. I didn’t get my driver’s license until age 19 due mostly to the fact that I was too lazy to take Driver’s Ed.

4. I once got schooled in a game of 3-on-3 basketball by Doug Flutie.

5. I am the poster boy for “Fear of Commitment” and am absolutely terrified by the notion that I could conceivably wind up being somebody’s parent.

6. I am a 2-time Past Master Councilor of Battle Green Chapter, Order of DeMolay, as well as a Past State Scribe.

7. I believe that Hugh Metzler is the funniest person on the face of the planet, particularly when he’s not trying to be.

8. A complete stranger once bought me and my buddy a beer in a restaurant bar because he had seen me perform in a show months earlier in a town about 30 miles away.

9. If I could have had anyone’s life but my own, I’d like to have been Jack Lemmon.

10. I don’t believe I am in any way “special”, but for the record, I don’t think any of you are either.

11. I have never been to either of the Disney theme parks.

12. My first sexual experience was with a woman who was twice my age at the time.

13. My family tree includes relatives who came over on the Mayflower and one who died on the Titanic.

14. I once shaved off all of my body hair for a role in a play.

15. I own over 2,000 CD’s, and feel like I’ve got my money’s worth out of about 90% of them.

16. When I was 11 years old, I was forced to stay inside for a month during the summer due to an allergic reaction to… soap.

17. I did not attend either of my proms, nor my high school graduation ceremony.

18. If I had been born a girl, my name was going to be Billy Jean. (Between Billy Jean King, the Michael Jackson song, and the inevitable “B.J. – that stands for ‘blow job’, right?” jokes, I think I was spared a childhood of torment, even if ‘Gordon’ wasn’t any picnic either.)

19. I have only been truly in love once in my life.

20. I have lived at 6 different addresses, all within a 25 mile radius of each other.

21. I can tell you the name of every album put out by – and every band member of – just about any 80’s hair metal band from 1985-1993. Odds are also strong that I own said albums in one form or another.

22. I have never eaten sushi.

23. I love my mom more than anything, but I almost never talk to her, and when I do, I have nothing to say.

24. I watch pro wrestling constantly, even though I think a lot of it sucks and it is an extremely embarrassing way to pass the time.

25. I love talking about myself SO MUCH that I’ve added 10 more things to my list!

26. I owe the fact that I’m alive today to the friends I made at age 16, even if I hardly ever talk to them anymore.

27. I eat tuna fish at least once a week and I’ve never come remotely close to getting sick of it.

28. For a number of years as a teenager, I carried an 8-inch, bendable Wile E. Coyote figure in my back pocket, with his arms and heading sticking out. I still have it to this day, as it currently hangs from the back of my work computer monitor (along with a twin).

29. I took my first ever steps on the lawn of Lyndon B. Johnson’s Presidential ranch.

30. The ending to three movies is guaranteed to make me cry, or at the very least get me extremely misty: “The Shawshank Redemption”, “Saving Private Ryan”, and “While You Were Sleeping”.

31. I own Britney Spears’ first album.

32. I frequently wish I could be a guest on “Inside The Actor’s Studio” just so I could answer that crazy Frenchman’s questionnaire at the end.

33. My dream job when I was eight years-old was to be the radio voice of the Boston Red Sox. My dream job today is the same.

34. The one thing in the world that is guaranteed to make me feel better is a trip to a record store, even if I don’t buy anything. It was the first place I went on the afternoon of 9/11 because I needed something comforting.

35. The most cherished moment of my life was standing at my best friend’s side during his wedding while he cried upon seeing his bride for the first time.

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